


Sleepless Night

by butterflybooks



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: M/M, post 2x16, short fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-20
Updated: 2017-07-20
Packaged: 2018-12-04 16:01:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11558607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/butterflybooks/pseuds/butterflybooks
Summary: In the wake of Robert's revelation, Alec thinks things over.





	Sleepless Night

Alec can't sleep.

It's not a particularly uncommon occurrence, although it has been less so in recent weeks. Then again, not only is he alone in the bed, his bed at the institute, but he's also-

The Clave does not have the Soul Sword. They do not know where the Soul Sword is. Valentine has escaped. No one knows where he is.

They've been lying to the Downworld.

The Downworld is not safe.

On the one hand, it is a very simple decision. He loves Magnus. He doesn't lie to Magnus, certainly not about something like this. He should tell Magnus, should tell the Downworld Council. The Clave have repeatedly shown themselves to be willing to sacrifice Downworld lives in order to save their own skins and this is no exception. Why should he feel bad about revealing their shoddily kept and ill thought out secret?

Because they _have_ lied. And if the Downworld discovers that, then they will be - with admittedly good reason - furious; it could mean the end of the Accords, the end of those fragile agreements upon which their world rests. It could mean outright war between Shadowhunters and Downworlders. It could mean the end of everything he knows, everything his family knows, any hope of peace.

Izzy had pretty much said that he shouldn’t tell Magnus for precisely this reason. And he knows – because he knows – that most Shadowhunters wouldn’t even consider telling anyone about this. But he’s not them, not anymore. Yet, still…

Is he ready to be responsible for a war that could cost lives on both sides?

But what if someone - by the angel, don't let it be Valentine - gets their hands on the Soul Sword? What if they manage to activate it again?

It's not just Magnus, although the fear he felt when searching for him after the attack on the institute is the first thing that comes to mind. It’s also Luke and Simon and Catarina and Madzie. Hell, even Meliorn and Raphael.

As well as hundreds upon thousands of Downworlders he doesn't know, can remember staring out at the city imagining how many there might be.

_They’re not all your responsibility._

Aren’t they? People, living out their lives, maybe not particularly bothered about Clave politics, maybe not even thinking about it day to day. 

People who could still die if the Clave and the Downworld go to war. 

Two scenarios. Neither of them are good. All could – probably will – cost lives. Inaction is making a choice. But inaction is not an option. 

And – _of course_ – the person he most wants to talk to about this is _Magnus_. 

He did briefly consider going to him; he could have asked him to keep it a secret from everyone else, until Alec makes a decision. But Alec knows Magnus, and that would be horrifically cruel, to ask him to keep a secret from people he loves. From his people. 

Magnus – Alec knows – also wouldn’t agree to keep that secret. Not even for Alec. Which Alec gets, but it means he can’t tell him without telling the entire Downworld. 

So it’s his decision – and his decision alone. He wanted to be a leader. Well. He is one. First question: whose deaths does he want on his conscience? 

He doesn’t sleep. 


End file.
